Last night after the show, I’m walking back to my hotel room alone after having two amazing shows. This is not one of my smartest moves, but I felt safe and that’s why I did it. I’m in the downtown streets of Dallas Fort Worth, and its busy, but as I keep walking it lessens. At one point when I’m a block away from the hotel, a 5’6″ pudgy dude walks up to me and he’s like, “Bro, don’t let me get rolled on!” He looks scared and is clearly intoxicated, and he’s like, “Bro I got your back, don’t let me get rolled on!” Then I look back and this dude is being followed. He thinks this guy is gonna shoot him, and he wants my help. Now I’m scared, but playing it cool, and trust, I’ve been in many situations, but nothing even close to this. We’re walking side by side at a rapid pace, and he’s pleading with me, he’s panicking, and I’m not saying anything, just surveying the scene. Now its like we’re both being followed. I start getting flashes of my family and things that I love and start thinking about my escape. The potential gunman, who I can’t really describe b/c it was so dark, has sped up his pace behind us. Now we’re coming up on a corner and I’m like, “Look, dude. As soon as we hit this corner, you smash left.” There’s no traffic or people around. Boom! We hit the corner. Pudgy drunk dude breaks left and I break right. I got far enough away that I can look back and notice that the gunman is now walking in the opposite direction. I hook another corner and I’m back inside my hotel room. I just start praying. I can’t sleep. I just sit up, stuck on frightening thoughts of what coulda been, and if this was my last day, am I proud of how I’m living.
Other than having the chills, I can’t stop thinking of all the petty issues that we face, and grudges we hold, and stuff that’s really not that serious. Be well. 1/12/13
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Saw your show last nite, it was great. Glad you are safe, would have hated to hear anything else!
I am coming to your show tonight at Acme Comedy Club in Minneapolis. After reading your experience in Dallas, I am very sympathetic and also worried about the lack of pure humanity this nation seems to be displaying. I dont know if you are aware of this, but earlier this week a student at a local high school hung a black doll from a noose in the hallways. I am deeply disturbed at the amount of ignorance and insensitivity to history that some of us share. I hope you have an honest welcoming in my city this weekend, and continue to use your voice as a comedian to spread truth and love. Thank you.
I’m glad you made it back to your hotel room safe. That’s crazy. The entire time I’m reading this story I’m getting nervous. I mean, what if you were able to identify the guy following you? Does he come after you now because he has another witness? Its a scary world we live in.
I just want to know where u in Dallas or Fort Worth, cuz I live in Dallas and we can seem scary but in Funky Town (Fort Worth) it is real gutta! Be safe wherever u are Mike!
I was in both, but when I got chased by the gunman, I was in Fort Worth.
Wow, I’m glad you’re ok man. I just found out about you and love your stuff. I would have hated to read about something happening to you. I hope everything is well.
O no well glad ur okay. I remember u from the store. Wow