Aunt Bern’s Ceiling Fan

I’m stayed with Aunt Bernadette and she has an old house, but that’s no excuse for a ceiling fan, that when turned on, looks like it might fall out of the wall and cut your head off. I love Aunty but when you have to make life decisions to cool down or be decapitated, we […]

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The Big Audition

So I’m In Santa Monica auditioning for this new George Lopez pilot, for TV Land. I studied, I’m in the room, and I murder the audition. I feel great, and I’m proud, because normally auditions suck ass. I don’t think I could feel any better. Then I walk outside of the audition room, and Ashy […]

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KIDS ARE HATERS SOMETIMES

One sign that your kid is a hater. Wife and I are sitting at the table, each on our laptops, minding our own business. Then he comes to my screen and says, “Dad, whose that girl.” Me: What girl? “The one that was on your screen before you clicked it off.” ‪#‎TIMETOINSTITUTEASSBEATING‬

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Celebrity Mishap

I’m at the Delta counter about to pay for my luggage. I have the card ready to pay and everything. Outta no where, the dude working is like When is your next show? I break him off with the details. ‪#‎TheyKnowMeUpinHere‬ Then he tells me where my gate is and I roll up outta there, and I […]

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