WHEN NOBODY CAME TO MY SHOW

As funny as you are, you’re still like, “I hope there’s a line at this show.” When no one is there, it’s not fun. I don’t care what people say. Some people say, “I don’t care if it’s 1 or 1000.” I’ll be honest, I perform differently if there’s 4 people vs. 900 in the audience. I’m gonna have A LOT more fun with the 900 people. At the end of the show with the 4 people, I’m probably gonna apologize and give them some free tickets to a future show. Shoot, I’ll probably be apologizing for the entire performance. It’s nothing like being in front of 900 audience members who came to laugh. Those 4 people should have been at THAT show, and the one with the 4 people should have been canceled. Whoever is reading this right now, I need you to look at my schedule make sure there is NEVER only 4 people at any show where people came to see me. Best, MEW